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A little levity

November 8, 2007

Here are some random moments of humor that have spiced up my morning.

Kids get a little weird around holiday time. My 6 year son has been making a “top-secret” birthday present for me (if this thought doesn’t frighten every fiber of your being then you obviously don’t have a 6 year old boy in your household). Turns out he saw a cartoon where the kids were collecting items to make a facial mask for the mother and Mr 6 decided that sounded like a good idea. He has ignored the fact that the mother on the cartoon didn’t like the facial mask and that his own mother has repeatedly informed him that she doesn’t like facial masks either. This morning I found out that he had made one for me from a mixture of odd leaves found in a friends yard, chicken and guinea feathers, glue, beads and maybe the left-overs of his mushroom and fungus hunt. Oh yeah, I am really going to put that on my face.

Conversation with the 11 year old that occurred in my bedroom this morning before I had my coffee.

Preteena: Mom, do you have any permanent markers?
Mom (skeptically): Yes
Preteena: May I borrow one?
Mr. 6 (fake-whispering** from the doorway): Tell her no!!

My husband has taken to making up daffy definitions for words this morning. Here are some of gems he shared via email at random points during the morning.

Agnostic: An atheist who is afraid to commit.
Shotgun Wedding: A matter of wife or death.

Mr. 6 came running upstairs to my bedroom.

Mr. 6 (half-panting): “Mom, DO NOT go into the bathroom downstairs.”
Mom (skeptically): “Why son”?
Mr. 6: “Because Preteena has to go potty in the downstairs bathroom so you cannot go in there” (just so you know, potty visits at our home are not usually preceded with announcements)
Mom: “Okay, son”
Mr 6 (fake-whispering** down the stairs): “It’s Okay… Go ahead…. I’ll be the look-out.
Mom: (thinking to herself) “Oh no. Should I wait or dial 911 now.”
Mr. 6 (every 30 seconds for the next 5 minutes or so still fake-whispering**) “She’s still there.”

If you will excuse me now I have to go see if I still have a downstairs bathroom.

** For those who might not know, a fake-whisper is a method of communication that involves a very breathy half-yell executed with the hands placed on either side of the mouth in order to keep the words secret from someone in the room while allowing them to be heard by another. A favorite method of communication among the Under 7 age group.

There was no apparent damage to the downstairs bathroom. I don’t know what the kids were up to but it didn’t leave its usual destruction and devastation behind. For that I am very thankful.

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